If I Loved You, I Would Tell You This - Pg 47 : If I Loved You

   There is a universe of sorrow, wide and dark, in my husband's staring eyes. An eternity built there, constructed over time, forged gradually of the realization that this is in fact our lives. This is what we have been dealt.
   It's possible, I say to him, that you were right. What you said about some folks just being bad.
   But as I speak, I realize how little I want to say what I have learned. How reluctant I am to admit to Sam what indifference truly means, and has long meant to us both. I do not want to play a role in confirming that cruel universe that dwells inside my husband's eyes. But I do love him. I do love him very much. And so to him--if not to you--I speak the truth.